Fox trotting
Do you sometimes scroll down the list in your mobile phonebook, or run your finger down the names in your address book and wonder: Who do I want to contact and meet up with and is free at the same time? Well I do, on a considerable basis, in fact.
As the bar of colour highlights each name as I scroll through the names in my mobile, reflections on the state and nature of my friendship with them flash through my mind. The exercise evolves into a mini-evaluation of my social life. My mood is usually more optimistic from A and deteriorates as it inches toward Z (yes I have friends whose names begin with this consonant). The flight itself is usually a fairly temperamental one - with peaceful halycon drifts, hiding amidst thick clouds, exhilarating nosedives and, you know the call, turbulences. Oh this one, nah don't think the meeting'll work out. Hmmm we haven't talked in ages, should I give it a shot? Oh! I didn't know he/she was still around, should I delete the contact off but it maybe useful having the number around? Ohhh - you gave me such a hard time, I wonder how you are right now... Yeah I should check how you're coming along, hope you're free.
Most of the times I get tired. The number of contacts are both too many and too few. It is a dance that is hard to keep up with sometimes. The music gets to my head and my partners sometimes swirl me around too fast. That is why it is better to be alone at times. No pressure and certainly no issues with matching foot with foot, leading/being led, or the rigours of understanding body language. Am I being selfish? Well I definitely have been accused of being more self-absorbed than giving. How true that is I can't and won't bother gauging. Time alone is a precious asset I think I don't treasure enough whenever it comes by. It is that time when everything fits into place - no one is contactable, that desire to contact soon fades away, the place is quiet, the weather fits the descriptions, and the materials for actualising the solitude are at hand...
For me I have the Word, a journal notebook, a pen, a set of colour pencils, a sketchbook, a computer and the flow of good music, a mug of water. Feet up on table, lamp beaming warm light down, hands moving to the rhythms of my mind. I am alive and well in my inspired solitude. It is all choice, feeling and appointment. Like dancing with someone but with a grace that is rather, different.
Am I making sense?
Perhaps not completely to you who are reading this. I guess my point is just this: I love the company of friends, couldn't have made it so far without them; but sometimes the relationship which allows me to truly move ahead is not found in a phonebook or email contact list.
Is there a name which I can call upon any time and know that I will receive company? and whom I wouldn't mind spending time with?
As the bar of colour highlights each name as I scroll through the names in my mobile, reflections on the state and nature of my friendship with them flash through my mind. The exercise evolves into a mini-evaluation of my social life. My mood is usually more optimistic from A and deteriorates as it inches toward Z (yes I have friends whose names begin with this consonant). The flight itself is usually a fairly temperamental one - with peaceful halycon drifts, hiding amidst thick clouds, exhilarating nosedives and, you know the call, turbulences. Oh this one, nah don't think the meeting'll work out. Hmmm we haven't talked in ages, should I give it a shot? Oh! I didn't know he/she was still around, should I delete the contact off but it maybe useful having the number around? Ohhh - you gave me such a hard time, I wonder how you are right now... Yeah I should check how you're coming along, hope you're free.
Most of the times I get tired. The number of contacts are both too many and too few. It is a dance that is hard to keep up with sometimes. The music gets to my head and my partners sometimes swirl me around too fast. That is why it is better to be alone at times. No pressure and certainly no issues with matching foot with foot, leading/being led, or the rigours of understanding body language. Am I being selfish? Well I definitely have been accused of being more self-absorbed than giving. How true that is I can't and won't bother gauging. Time alone is a precious asset I think I don't treasure enough whenever it comes by. It is that time when everything fits into place - no one is contactable, that desire to contact soon fades away, the place is quiet, the weather fits the descriptions, and the materials for actualising the solitude are at hand...
For me I have the Word, a journal notebook, a pen, a set of colour pencils, a sketchbook, a computer and the flow of good music, a mug of water. Feet up on table, lamp beaming warm light down, hands moving to the rhythms of my mind. I am alive and well in my inspired solitude. It is all choice, feeling and appointment. Like dancing with someone but with a grace that is rather, different.
Am I making sense?
Perhaps not completely to you who are reading this. I guess my point is just this: I love the company of friends, couldn't have made it so far without them; but sometimes the relationship which allows me to truly move ahead is not found in a phonebook or email contact list.
Is there a name which I can call upon any time and know that I will receive company? and whom I wouldn't mind spending time with?
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